


Internet Lovers

by tyjo22518



Series: Internet Lovers S1 [1]
Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-27
Updated: 2018-07-01
Packaged: 2019-05-29 13:53:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 7,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15074573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tyjo22518/pseuds/tyjo22518
Summary: Josh was always the fun kid, the guy that everyone looked up to.Tyler was the exact opposite.





	1. Chapter 1

Josh was always the cool kid. The one who had countless friends, and a big reputation around school. He was the nice guy. Josh was the kind of person that if you had a 30 minute conversation with him, it was like you’ve known him your whole life. He was the guy that everyone wanted to be. 

 

Tyler was the loner. He had very few friends, mainly acquaintances. He was known for being the shy kid, and the emo kid. He didn’t listen to that “emo” music, it was mainly the way he was dressed. He rarely spoke. He was the guy no one wanted to be. 

———

Tyler spends most of his time lurking on Twitter. He doesn’t tweet often. Normally between 1 and 3 AM when he can’t sleep. When his thoughts are keeping him awake. He follows the accounts that are meant to distract him from himself. Mainly funny videos, or quotes. 

Tonight is no different from any other night. He struggled to find himself peaceful enough to sleep. He lay awake in and paces the room to release energy. His bedroom is painted a faint gray, with white accent walls. He had a desk opposite of his bed. His bookshelf was more of a music shelf. He had journals stacked a plenty on his desk. Each filled with parts of his thoughts he struggled to keep to himself. He sat down at his desk and read through each journal. Some parts made him laugh, others cry. He flipped through the pages until he stumbled upon a line that sent chills down his spine. 

“sometimes to stay alive you’ve gotta kill your mind.” 

He didn’t think anything of it when he took a photo of the line and shared it on twitter. Maybe it would help someone. Who knows. Tyler set his phone aside and continued looking through his journals. 

—————

Josh returned home from a celebration with his friends. His schools football team had won the big game and one of the teammates invited him to join the team for dinner. Josh loved interacting with people and meeting them, but there were always days when he wanted to be left to himself, to let his mind wonder on things that you wouldn’t think of when you thought of Josh. 

He pondered death a lot. He realized this was strange for him. It wasn’t like he was aware of what he was doing. He showered and got ready for bed and looked at the clock. 1:30 AM. He sighed and knew it would be a late night. 

He lay in bed and scrolled through twitter. He wasted a lot of his time on that app, but it took his mind off of things. He scrolled and scrolled the hours away. He scrolled past a picture and went back to read what it said. 

“Sometimes to stay alive you gotta kill your mind” 

One of the people he followed had retweeted it. He liked the image and thought about what it had meant to him. He decided later that he liked the meaning. The message simply meant to kill the bad thoughts you are having. How, he didn’t know. But something in that message clicked in his brain. He clicked on the users profile. 

Tyler Joseph. 

There were these weird dots in his bio and he saw that he had his DMs open. His heart rate increased as he decided to send him a message. 

“Hey. I know you don’t know me, but I saw your picture with that kill your mind quote. Thanks for sharing. It means something to me. I’m still trying to figure out what, but it’s incredible.” 

He hit send and closed twitter for the night. He tossed and turned but eventually fell asleep. 

———-

Tyler’s phone went off for the first time, in a long time. The sound itself spooked him. He picked up his phone and saw that it was from twitter. 

Joshua Dun. 

He read Joshua’s message, and it made his heart sing. He always loved helping people, when he got the chance to. He read the message a few times before deciding to respond. 

“Thanks for liking what i wrote. it means the world to me. I hope you figure out what it means to you. -Tyler” 

He decides to look through Joshua’s twitter. He follows him, of course. He looks through his pictures and finds a few of them with his friends. He finds a couple of shirtless pictures and he feels slightly aroused. 

He turns his phone off for the night, hoping that the boy would reply to him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He plugs in his charger and he finds that he has a message on Twitter. He looks at the notification, confused, but then remembers who he messaged last night.
> 
> Tyler.

Josh woke up, 7 hours later. At 8:30 in the morning. He reaches for his phone only to realize that he didn’t charge his phone during the night. He plugs in his charger and he finds that he has a message on Twitter. He looks at the notification, confused, but then remembers who he messaged last night.

Tyler.

He smiled reading his message. He didn’t know how to respond to him. But he typed away until he decided what he had was fine.

“Oh, no problem dude. I’m glad it means something to you. You know someone relating to what you wrote. I’m Josh btw. You could probably tell by my username but i thought i’d properly introduce myself. Am I rambling yet?”

He sent the message and it seemed like minutes went by before he got a response. But he did. 

“Uh yeah just a little. It’s plausible that you rambled. But it’s okay. I’m Tyler. Even though i told you last night.” 

Josh smirked at his message and began to type his own. 

“so what’s got you up so early?” 

“You’re just gonna assume we are in the same time zone?” 

“Oh i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to assume. It’s hard to imagine that there’s more out there than just Columbus Ohio.” 

“Wait... you’re from Columbus too?” 

“Yeah born and raised.” 

“Dude that’s so sick! But to answer your question, i’m up this early because sleep does not exist for me. Or it doesn’t like for me to think it doesn’t exist. It being sleep.” 

“Yeah i caught on to that. You know if you wanted to, we could meet up today?” 

————-

Tyler’s heart almost flew out of his chest reading that message. Josh wants to meet up? With HIM? of all people? 

“Sorry. I’d feel better knowing you better. You know, that you weren’t some internet killer or something” 

“Haha. Yeah i understand that. Maybe instead of meeting up, we could facetime? you have an iphone right?”

“yes i have an iphone. here’s my number.” 

Tyler sends Josh his number and his anxiety is going through the roof. Maybe something will come from this call.

————

Josh adds Tyler as a contact in his phone and hits Facetime. It rings a few times and then it says connecting. Tyler had a few pictures on his profile, but hopefully they were of him. 

“So you must be Josh” 

Tyler’s hair is all over the place, but he makes it look good. He smiles and Josh notices his crooked tooth on the bottom row. 

“And you must be Tyler.” 

“You know I never thought you’d have bright blue hair.”

“Yeah. I don’t really update my profile that often. So i should probably get on that. Do you like it though?” 

“Yeah it’s sick! I love it.” 

They smile at each other for a few minutes before tyler coughs and speaks up to say something. 

“So Josh. How do you feel about Taco Bell?” 

“Oh fuck i love taco bell” 

“You mean frick.” 

“Oh. Sorry. But yes, i love taco bell.” 

“Yeah me too. It’s the frickin best. How people prefer Chipotle, I’ll never know.” 

“What else do you like besides taco bell?” 

Tyler immediately responds 

“You.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The two stayed on Facetime till the moon put them both to sleep. The stars gave them both dreams, of meeting. The sun would rise, and wake them... but that’s for another day

it takes a minute for Tyler to realize what came out of his mouth. He just told this, practically, stranger that he liked him. He feels his cheeks burn with embarrassment 

“sorry josh.” 

he lets out a chuckle “no no. it’s okay. don’t worry about it.” 

“to actually answer your question, i don’t really know what i like. music is cool. i write a lot. I used to play basketball, but now the creative stuff is more my style.”

“that’s amazing actually.”

“oh really?” 

“yeah.” 

“well what about you? i hate talking about myself so much.” 

“uh i play the drums a lot. I have this fascination about dying my hair crazy colors. and i have this weird hobby of going to record stores and asking the most tatted guy there for music recommendations” 

Tyler let’s out a laugh “that’s sick. just don’t dye your hair so often, you don’t want it to fall out by the time you’re 30” 

Joshs eyes get small when he smiles and Tyler smiles back at him. The two talk for what feels like hours. Actually, it was two and a half. Josh had to go to get ready because his family was going something today. Tyler ended the facetime call and held his phone to his chest. Tyler got himself ready for the day, even though he had no plans. He opened his window, and watched as the mid-day clouds rolled in. 

———

Josh felt something in his stomach after he ended the call. He’s never felt this feeling before. Butterflies? Maybe. He couldn’t shake that feeling the whole day while he was out with his family. No one really noticed his up-tempo mood. Most likely because he was always happy. No one really saw the sad side of Josh. 

His anxiety is often masked by his success. Success being used loosely of course. He had good grades, and that high reputation. That naturally brought on his pressure of feeling inadequate is something didn’t work out how he planned. 

Josh’s happiness never faded that day. When he came back home from shopping all day, he decided to text his friend to see what was going on. 

“Hey!” 

“hi.” 

something in tylers tone, woke up the comforting side of Josh. He usually doesn’t talk about feelings. For some reason, that seems to be in the guys code for society. even though being emotional is a strength, not a weakness.

“You ok?” 

“yep.” 

Josh plugs in his phone for the second time today and he calls tyler. Facetimed, actually. Tyler denied the call. This frustrated him. He couldn’t help but feel unsettled by this situation. 

“not now, Josh.” 

“Tyler, i won’t stop bugging you until I know what’s going on.” 

“i’m fine.” 

“Are you sure?” 

No response. Josh waited. 10 minutes had gone by. another 10. eventually 40 minutes had gone by. He decided to take a shower to take his mind off of things. He allowed his mind to go somewhere else while he got rid of the dirt from the day. When he got out, he dried off just enough to put on pants. 

He looked at his phone and saw that he had 5 missed facetime calls from Tyler. He called back immediately. 

“Hello?” 

“Hey Tyler. sorry, i was in the shower.” 

“oh. it’s fine.” 

Tylers nose is red and his eyes are really puffy. Part of joshs heart breaks for him. 

“you okay?” 

“yeah i’m...” a tear falls from his eye. Josh almost starts crying himself, but pulls himself together. 

If there’s one thing that’s always held true with Josh, it’s that he will show every emotion possible, but he won’t let someone see that he’s sad. 

——-

“actually josh, i’m not.” 

Tyler almost breaks on those words. No ones ever really cared for him this much. Of course his family did, but there’s only so much they can say. And how many times they can say the same things. 

“What’s wrong?” 

“That’s just it, i don’t know.” 

He never really knows what gets him so upset. He has a good life, a wonderful family. Sure he gets teased, but it’s nothing to what other people experience. But then again, a great life doesn’t equal happiness. 

“It’s okay. It’s okay to not know.” 

“It’s like i’m an emotional vacuum ya know?” 

“No i don’t know..” 

“Basically. I take on other people’s sadness, or depression, or whatever, so they don’t have to. It gets hard, because i don’t know what feelings are truly mine.” 

“Oh tyler. I’m sorry.” 

“Everyone’s sorry. But i don’t mind doing it. I’d rather me feel sad, than anyone else.” 

“But you deserve happiness too.” 

“I don’t. I’m so underserving of happiness, Josh.” 

“but you are. Happiness is something that all people should feel” 

“I’m not all people.” 

“I know you aren’t. But, happiness is something you should want” 

“It is. 100 percent. But i’ve been sad for so long, I don’t know if I would know how to be happy.” 

————

Those words alone hit Josh like a knife. How could someone so precious and so love-able, feel so much, but feel so little. 

“Josh, will you stay awake with me tonight?” 

“Of course I will. I have church in the morning, though.” 

“It’s okay, so do I.” 

The two stayed on Facetime till the moon put them both to sleep. The stars gave them both dreams, of meeting. The sun would rise, and wake them... but that’s for another day.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “so i can send you your christmas present” 
> 
> “josh. it’s november 5th.” 
> 
> “hey. you can never plan too early.” 
> 
> “that’s like saying you can play christmas music in July. Its not okay.”

a few weeks had gone by since that call. Josh and Tyler grew incredibly close with each other. They talked every single day. Even though they haven’t met, they were inseparable. 

Fall had quickly began and it was almost thanksgiving. Tyler’s heart was warm with the thought of meeting him over the holiday. It was a thought in the back of his mind that he couldn’t shake. If not thanksgiving, christmas. He didn’t care when, as long as he got to meet him. 

Tyler quickly began texting josh. 

“Hey josh. i have an idea” 

“What’s that?” 

“Why don’t we meet up over the break?” 

“That sounds incredible but” 

“but what?” 

“i’m going out of state for break” 

Tyler’s heart sunk to the bottom of his stomach. He expected this answer, but he didn’t think it would be a reality. He feels slightly let down, by himself. 

“oh. that’s cool.” 

“yeah. i’m sorry.” 

“it’s fine. it’s funny how we are in the same city, but so far apart.” 

“yeah. it’s crazy isn’t it?” 

“yeah.” 

————

Josh could feel Tylers mood shift when he told him he was going out of state for thanksgiving. Truth be told, Josh felt the same way. But there was something Josh was keeping from Tyler. 

It’s not that he feels like Tyler would judge him, more or less that tyler wouldn’t feel the same things he was. He didn’t know when he was going to tell him this, but it had to be soon for what he was planning. 

“Tyler what’s your address?” 

“um. why?” 

“so i can send you your christmas present” 

“josh. it’s november 5th.” 

“hey. you can never plan too early.” 

“that’s like saying you can play christmas music in July. Its not okay.” 

“just give me your address.” 

“fine.” 

Joshs heart lit up. He put tylers address into Google maps, and they were only an hour away from each other. He smiled from ear to ear. He was getting his license soon. The gears in his mind went rolling as he remembered that Tylers birthday was the first of December. 

He went to his calendar and saw that his birthday was on a saturday. He knew exactly what he was going to do.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hey Josh!” 
> 
> “Hey Tyler. What are you doing?” 
> 
> “Just about to decorate the christmas tree. since the day after Thanksgiving is when we do it. Knowing you, you probably had it up weeks ago.”

Josh spent weeks planning this surprise out. He booked his ride, thanks to his mom, got tylers present, and everything was set for him to meet tyler on his birthday. December 1 was a few days away. He only had one thing left to do before he met Tyler in person. 

It was late that friday evening. Josh had just come back from Thanksgiving with a few family members. He anxiously called Tyler, waiting for him to answer his FaceTime request. 

Connecting...

“Hey Josh!” 

“Hey Tyler. What are you doing?” 

“Just about to decorate the christmas tree. since the day after Thanksgiving is when we do it. Knowing you, you probably had it up weeks ago.” 

“Have you been spying on me?” 

“maybe. so what’s up?” Tyler put in headphones so he could hear Josh better. He saw his mom wave at Josh and he waved back. “did you want to say hi to them or something?” 

“I can.” 

“Alright everyone say hi to my best fren josh. Make it snappy because he’s gotta tell me something private.” 

Everyone says hi to josh and he can hear tylers little sister say that he was hot. Josh couldn’t help but blush. 

“okay going to my room now, i’ll be back soon.” Tyler runs to his room and shuts the door. He sets his phone down on his desk and turns the light on. “So what’s up?” 

“There’s something I need to tell you.” 

———

Tyler’s adrenaline immediately picks up. His mind is going a mile a minute. 

“Tell me.” 

“Please don’t be upset at me, or think differently of me.” 

“I promise.”

“Tyler. I’m.” Josh tears up a little bit and coughs to cover it up. 

“Josh? What’s going on? You aren’t leaving are you?” Tyler himself almost breaks down. The thought of his best friend just leaving, terrifies him. 

“No i’m not. i promise. but Tyler. I’m” 

“Come on Josh just tell me. I won’t be upset.” 

“I’m gay, Tyler.” 

“You are?” 

“Yeah.” 

“You know Josh. i’ve been meaning to tell you this because I didn’t know how it would affect our friendship but.. I’m gay too.” 

“Wait seriously?” 

“Yeah. I’m being completely honest.” 

“Oh wow.” 

“What?” 

“Nothing. I’ve gotta go. Have fun decorating your christmas tree. Send pictures when it’s done.” 

Tyler smiles and hangs up the call and heads back downstairs with a smile on his face as he decorates tree with his family. 

“What’s got you all happy tonight dear?” Tylers mom asks as he helps her put some ornaments on the tree. 

“Just josh that’s all.” 

“I’ll have to thank him sometime.” 

Tyler raises an eyebrow. “For what?” 

“Bringing your smile back.”

He smiles back at her and feels something his heart to tell her what he’s been afraid too for a while. 

“Um. I have something to say.” 

“Well go ahead sweetie. It’s just us really. Everyone else went down to the den.”

“Uhh please don’t be upset.” 

“Tyler honey, what did you do?”

He lets out a laugh. “Nothing. but there is something important i want to tell you.”

“Okay.” 

“I’m gay.” 

Tyler’s mom looks at him. Her eyes fill with water. She rushes over and hugs him, embracing him in her arms. To her, a weight had been lifted off of her shoulders. 

“Honey, I know. I was waiting for you to tell me.” 

Tyler laughs and he feels immediately better about himself. This was a part of him, that he’s been hiding for so long. He’s been hiding it from himself. 

————-

Josh went down to his own living room and flipped through the channels as he searched for a christmas movie to watch. His buddies have reached out to him to hangout, but he didn’t feel the need to reach out. 

He finally settled on a channel to watch when his phone went off. 

It was a picture of Tyler standing next to his tree, giving a thumbs up.

“Wow look at you.” 

“is there something on my face?” 

“you’re so handsome.” 

“i’m really not, Josh. That’s you.”

“you are. i wish you knew how amazing you look” 

“thanks jish” 

“Jish?” 

“autocorrect, sorry.”

“no it’s fine. i like jish.” 

“well, that’s your nickname then. it’s settled” 

“i like you Tyler.” 

“I like you too, Josh”


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler hated his birthday.

Josh woke up December 1st, being the happiest guy on earth. Today was the day he was surprising his best friend. He wore a red sweater with black skinny jeans paired with black boots. He sprayed on some cologne and he got in his moms car as they drove to tylers. He was able to get tylers moms instagram off of tylers page and message her to make sure he looked nice and had everything ready. 

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY TYLER!!!”

“thanks josh.” 

“hey! no foul moods today. It’s your birthday for crying out loud” 

“yeah, you’re right.” 

he left tyler on read. he hated doing that, but he felt like if he continued talking, he would ruin the surprise. they left for tylers at 9:30 in the morning. If all went as planned, they would be there by 10:30, maybe even 10:45 latest. His mom talked with him about how excited she was for him. Everyone was excited for Josh. 

 

———

Tyler hated his birthday. He hated everything about it. It was a celebration of his life, but to him, his life meant nothing. He felt like he wasn’t doing anything impactful. Sure he helped a couple of people, but anyone could do that. That’s what he thought. Maybe his birthday would mean something someday. 

“Tyler! Come here please!” 

He makes his way downstairs. Slowly, but he gets there. His family always made a big deal about his birthday. Last year was worse. Sixteen. At least this year was nothing of importance. 

“Morning.” 

“Happy Birthday!” Everyone shouted. Jay and Madison ran up to Tyler and wrapped him a hug. Zack even had a smile on his face. “There’s the birthday boy!” His father Chris shouted from the living room as he walked over and sat down at the table. 

“Thanks guys.” 

His mom handed him a flannel to wear for the day. She never picked out their clothes, except for when they were too young to dress themselves, and on their birthdays. It was red and black. His favorite. 

They ate a big breakfast and everyone seemed all jumpy. Tyler brushed it off as he went to change and get himself prepared for the day ahead of him. 

He didn’t know how he felt turning seventeen. It wasn’t an important year. Sure he would be eighteen next year, but seventeen is just a gap. Nothing significant happens. 

He took out his phone and snapped a picture of himself and posted it onto instagram.   
“seventeen.” was all he captioned it. 

“Tyler come here please!” 

He went down stairs and Chris covered his eyes. 

“What’s going on?” 

He heard the door open, and close again. His heart was about to fly out of his mouth. his hands started shaking, and his throat got real dry.

“Okay Tyler. close your eyes. Chris move your hands.” 

He closed his eyes and the tension in his veins spread all over. He knees felt like baby rattles. 

“can I open my eyes yet?” 

“3. 2. 1. Okay tyler! Open your eyes!” 

Tyler opened his eyes and he couldn’t believe it when he saw his best friend. Josh. He took a few steps back, in shock. He smiled from ear to ear and ran up to him giving him the biggest hug. His heart exploded with happiness at the sight of him, wrapping his arms around him. 

“Happy Birthday, Tyler.” 

“Oh my god. How? What?” 

“I wanted to surprise you. I felt so bad that we couldn’t meet during thanksgiving but I knew i had to be here today.” 

 

Everyone was snapping pictures of them and for once, Tyler didn’t mind his picture being taken.

————

Josh loved being in tylers presence. He got to meet the whole family, well, the family that was there. He took so many pictures with Tyler that it felt like his face would be stuck smiling. Joshs mom wished tyler a happy birthday and had to leave for work. 

“i cant believe you’re here.” 

joshs cheeks turned a rosy red color and he knew this was the boy he loved. 

“I want to ask you something” 

“anything. go ahead.” 

“Will you be my boyfriend?” 

Tyler looked at josh with the biggest smile on his face. 

“Yes.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas love

Josh stayed over night and celebrated the rest of Tylers birthday with him. They were dating. Tyler’s dream of finding love, had come true. He knew it was too early to call it love, but he knew it was there. On his birthday, they went out to eat and walked around the mall. Tyler’s family couldn’t help but notice that Tyler and Josh were holding hands most of the time, but it made everyone happy to see Tyler smile again. 

“Thanks for spending my birthday with me.” 

“I wouldn’t have missed it for the world.” 

Josh was cuddling Tyler. It was something they had both pictured in their heads but it was finally happening. 

“I think my family really likes you.” 

“Oh yeah?” 

“Yeah. My mom cried the other day when I told her I liked you.” 

“Everyone’s been really sweet.” 

Tyler’s smile never faded that day. He felt like a little kid. His happiness seemed never ending. 

“It’s a shame I have to leave in the morning.” 

“I’m gonna miss you.”   
Tyler’s happiness slightly faded. 

“I’ll be back. You can promise that.”

“Luckily Christmas break is in a couple of weeks.” 

“That’s the spirit.”

They fell asleep cuddled up to each other. Tyler felt peace for the first time in his life. He liked this feeling, and wanted to keep it. Tyler had something to call his. A boyfriend. A lover. Whatever it may be. Tyler fell for this kid. 

They woke up earlier that morning and smiled at each other. It was their last few hours together. They got semi dressed for the day, mainly in sweatpants and a shirt. Tyler’s mom had made breakfast, and everyone seemed peaceful that morning. Josh left the house around 12, when his Mom picked him up. Tyler had walked him to the car, and they hugged for what seemed like a year. When they left, Tylers sadness creeped up inside.   
He went back up to his room, and went on his phone. He kept looking at the picture they took together when he came here. He decided to post it onto instagram with the caption “my best fren” 

He felt lonely today. His best friend went home and it seemed like the world turned its lights off. Something inside gravitated him towards his journals where he grabbed his pen and began to write:

“Now the night is coming to an end. The sun, will rise and we will try again. Stay alive, stay alive, for me?” 

———

The next few weeks seemed to drag and drag. Josh and Tyler had talked every single day. They both got each other’s christmas presents. 

Tyler had gotten Josh new drumsticks. Josh got tyler a few journals and a picture of them framed. 

The week of christmas seemed to just crawl like a snail. The two would be reunited on the 26th. It was arranged for josh to stay through new years. 

On christmas morning, the only thing tyler or josh could think about was seeing each other. They even facetimed while they were opening their presents. 

“Tyler, I think you’ll like this one” His mom said handing him a long rectangular present. 

“If it’s another flannel, i’m done.” 

They all let out a laugh. “It’s not sweetie.” 

Tyler raised an eyebrow and opened the gift. “A keyboard?” 

“Well I know you’re always writing stuff down, so I figured i would get you this so you could make something more out of it.” 

Tyler almost cried, but swallowed the tears and thanked his mom for the gift. Josh smiled when he saw how happy Tyler was. He couldn’t wait to see that smile in person. 

Christmas dinner was a feast for both the families. They weren’t on Facetime, because by morning they would be together. The stars were dancing that night, as they headed to sleep. It would be the last sleep they had, to get to each other.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “It’s worth it to stay alive. You helped me realize that.”

December 26th. Tyler woke up bright and early for this day. He quickly got ready and decided to wear all black. That was his safety outfit. Josh was going to be there soon. he wanted everything to be perfect for his boyfriend. 

“Can’t wait to see you today!” Josh texted him around 8 AM 

“same here. i’m nervous, though.” 

“whys that?” 

“i don’t know. i just have a weird feeling in my stomach. i cant shake it.” 

“it’ll be okay! i promise. im going to go get ready.” 

He sets his phone aside and wraps joshs present. He prays that he likes it. He prayed even harder that he had his own drum set. Tyler’s heart swelled with the thought of them living together and making music. It seemed so ideal, and so realistic. He sat down in the living room and tried to settle on a channel. his leg shaking so fast, it seemed like the whole house was going to shake. 

“hey. come outside.”

Tyler practically ran to the door, but calmed himself down before he opened it. When he came outside, he saw josh standing outside of his house with flowers and a present. Tyler’s eyes fill with water as he walks up to Josh. 

“Merry late Christmas.”

Josh sets the flowers down and wraps tyler in a hug. Joshs heart is beating a mile a minute as Tyler looks at him and kisses his cheek. 

“Thank you, oh my god. i cant believe you’re here!” 

Joshs monk gets out of the car and hugs me as well. She helps Josh and I carry stuff inside the house. We chat for awhile before she leaves and hugs Josh. 

“Wait right here!” 

Tyler runs up the stairs to grab Joshs gift. 

———

Josh waits for Tyler downstairs and puts the flowers on the table. He puts Ty’s gift next to it. He almost cried thinking about how lucky is, to have met such an incredible boy. His family comes down the stairs and greets Josh. They asked him about the ride, and how he was doing. Tyler came back down carrying a long box. 

“It’s not much, but i hope you like it.” 

He takes the box from Tyler and carefully opens it. His eyes almost fall out of his head. Red drumsticks with black stripes. 

“Tyler. I love it. Thank you.” 

“You’re welcome. I know you like playing the drums so of course you had to have your own sticks.” 

Josh smiles and his eyes get all small. He grabs tyler’s presents, and hands the bag to him. 

He reaches inside the bag and pulls out a journal and new pens to write with. He opens the journal to find a note written inside. 

“It’s worth it to stay alive. You helped me realize that. -Josh” 

Tyler pauses while reading the note. His eyes get all puffy and his nose turns a shade of red. He wipes a tear from his eye.

“thank you, so much. this means the world to me.” 

“There’s more.” 

He reaches back in the bag and pulls out a frame with a picture they took when they first met. This makes tyler cry even more.

“How did I get so lucky?”

“I’m the lucky one.” 

Zack looks up from his phone and rolls his eyes. “ugh get a room.” 

Tyler gives him the death stare as he takes josh upstairs. 

“oh my god they’re gonna have sex” Zack says to himself. quietly enough so no one hears him. 

Tyler shuts the door behind him and puts the picture on his bedside table. They sit down on Tylers bed and hold hands for a while. 

“I’m really glad you’re here.” 

“Me too.” 

Tyler raises an eyebrow. “You okay?” 

“Yeah i’m fine.” 

“Josh.” 

“Tyler.”

Tyler let’s out a laugh. “Are you sure you’re okay?” 

“Yeah i’m fine.” 

Tyler walks over to his desk and holds up a card and a set of keys. 

“I got my license before christmas break, and I happen to have a set of my parents car keys. How about we go get some lunch?” 

“I think i’d like that very much.” 

The pair got into the car and drove off to a place they both would like. Taco Bell. There was a small crowd there, but nothing too out of the normal. Especially for it being the day after christmas. They walk in hand in hand, and place their order. 

While walking to the booth, a few people give them a dirty look. 

———

Tyler knew these people from school. The trouble makers that picked on anyone who was slightly different from them. 

“Look its Tyler and his fag boyfriend.”   
The group of kids laugh and point fingers. An older couple looks at the kids and roll their eyes at them.

Josh looks at the kids and when they sit down, he rolls up his sleeves.

“Getting kinda warm in here.” 

“It may be because I’m with the hottest person on the planet.” 

Josh blushes which makes him even more warm inside. 

“Order for Tyler.” 

Tyler smiles at the lady and walks up to get the tray of food. 

Josh hears a few people whispering about him when he walks away.

“Wow. I wonder how much that guy is being paid to hang out with the loner.” 

Josh clenches his fists and his knuckles turn a bright white. He looks back at the kids and sits down at the table.

“What’s your problem?” 

“I’m not the one with the problem you bright haired freak.” 

“You know, the ones who are picking on someone for being a certain way, are often trying to hide it from themselves.”

A kid named Brendon, who tyler knew from his homeroom busted out laughing. “HA HA YOURE FUCKED” 

Josh walks away and smiles when Tyler sits back down at the booth. 

“What was that all about?”

“Nothing. Don’t worry about it babe.” 

Tyler blushes as they hold hands and eat their lunch. Tyler felt so alive and safe when josh was there. 

He never wanted this feeling to go away.


	9. Chapter 9

Sometimes, all Tyler needed to hear was that he was going to be okay. December 31 was the last day of the year. Of course having Josh there made everything better, but his anxiety was still boiling like a pot on a stove. 

he gripped joshs hand tightly under the sheets as he was going to drown in a sea of panic.

“Ty.. are you okay?”

“no, i’m not.”

“What’s wrong?” 

“It’s December 31st. The last day of the year.”

“Yeah. What about it?” 

“Josh, I barely made it this year. I don’t know how i’m going to do it all over again.”

What Tyler was saying, was true. He barely made it out of the year alive. His depression seemed to intensify each year and it really showed no signs of slowing down. He believed he could get better. But there’s no such thing as getting better. 

“I believe in you for next year. and all the years after.” 

“why? why me?” 

“because, there’s a difference between this year and next.” 

“what’s that?”

“i’ll be there the whole time.” 

Tyler smiled and let his mind wonder off to what might become of them. Maybe they’d date throughout the rest of junior and senior year. maybe they’d move into together. marriage? It was still so early to think about, but it allowed Tyler’s mind to be out of his body. 

“what’s going on inside that pretty head of yours?” 

“just letting my mind explore the future.” 

“am i invited to the party?” 

“well, you’re hosting it with me. I’d assume so.” 

Josh kissed Tylers forehead. It was pretty much unspoken, but they knew they were saving their first REAL kiss at midnight tonight. 

“what are we doing at this party?” 

“dancing the night away. in our own house or apartment.” 

“what are you doing?” 

“playing the piano and singing the love song i wrote for you.” 

Josh wrapped Tyler in his arms and decided he liked the idea of living with Tyler. It would be the ideal situation, given that there’s no awkwardness of learning about your roommate. 

Around noon, they decide to head down to the kitchen and join the family for new year’s eve lunch. It was the prequel to the feast. Ty’s mom made mini sandwich subs, and a bunch of different sides. 

Tyler and Josh sat beside each other and had causal conversation with everyone. Zack asked about how he got into drums and most of the conversation was about music. 

“So josh, how are liking it here?” 

“Mom.. he lives an hour away.” 

“I meant staying here.” 

“It’s wonderful Mrs. Joseph. I really appreciate your hospitality while i’ve been here.” 

Around 3, everyone gets ready for the new year’s eve party tonight. Ty’s mom had invited a bunch of people from her work, and his dad invited his friends from the local high school. Zack, Jay and Madison had invited their friends over. 

All of that didn’t matter. Tyler had Josh. It was going to be awkward with all of those people. He was only out to his mom and josh. 

“What do you think about this?” Josh held up black button up shirt and dark blue jeans.

“no. try this.” Tyler picked out a red flannel and black jeans for the both of them. 

“matching?”

“it’s the only dress clothes i have.” 

Josh pulled out a floral kimono from his bag and put it on tyler. 

“it matches with all black. you look hot.” 

Tyler blushed and looked at himself in the mirror. He liked what he saw, but it almost didn’t reflect who he was. He decided to keep it on. He looked through some of the clothes in his closet to see if Josh could wear something of his. 

“I could just wear all black. It’s what I do anyway.” 

“Yeah. If you want.” Tyler smiles at him. 

“You okay?” 

“Just worried is all.” 

“About what?” 

“Just having everyone there. They’re all gonna be looking at me. I’m not even out to my Dad.” 

“Oh Tyler.” 

“I just want to love you. You know? Free of judgment.” 

“So do it. Who cares?”

“They care. I don’t want to hurt them.” 

“Ty. Loving who you want, is not going to hurt them.” 

“I don’t know.” Tyler sits on his bed, and puts his head in his hands. It felt like the weight of the solar system was on his shoulders. 

“Tyler, it will all be okay.” 

“Should I just come out to them?” 

“Now?” 

“Why not? I have nothing else to loose.” 

“It’s your decision.” 

Tyler tossed the idea around in his head. All the love songs in his life were written about a gay couple. He was living the love life he wanted through song. He couldn’t write the love story he wanted to with Josh without being able to start the first chapter.

Maybe it was time for him to come out? 

Maybe.. Just maybe.


	10. Chapter 10

Tyler felt it in his soul to tell people who he really was. He was tired of feeling like the people around him were just furniture. Those people were his family. He decided that he would come out to his siblings first. So he did. 

“Tyler, I already knew. I just didn’t want to say anything until you were ready.” Zack said as he hugged his brother. Zack wished tyler knew how much he looked up to him. 

Jay and Madison were partially confused but understood when they thought it over. They were connecting the dots as to why Josh was holding his hand, and bringing him flowers. It all made sense to them. He was the same Tyler, just now they learned something new. 

Tyler knew deep down that coming out to his dad, was going to be the hardest thing he was ever going to do. His dad had planned his life in his head. Getting a basketball scholarship, marrying a beautiful woman, having kids. He didn’t take an offer for the scholarship. He wasn’t going to marry a girl, and the likely hood of him having kids was slim to none. 

He walked down the stairs and his dad was in the kitchen cleaning the dishes. He felt like he was going to vomit everywhere, but he kept it together. He had to do this. 

“Hey Dad. Can i talk to you for a second?” 

“Of course, sport. What’s on your mind?” 

Tyler sits down at the kitchen table and his Dad follows him. 

“I don’t want you to be mad or disappointed in me.” 

“Ty, there’s nothing you could do to make me love you any less. you know that.” 

“Um here’s the thing Dad. I’m not what you want me to be.” 

“Now Tyler. You are the best son anyone could ask for. Why are you saying that?” 

“Because.” He wipes a tear from his eye. “I don’t want to marry a girl and have kids.” 

His dad looks at him. “Well what do you want?” He reaches out his hand and holds Tyler’s. 

“Dad. I want to marry a boy. I’m gay, dad.” 

His dad moves over and hugs Tyler.   
His heart empties out onto his dads sleeve. He’s finally out. He told the people he needed to tell. 

“Oh Ty. It’s okay. It’s okay.” 

“I’m sorry. I don’t want you to be upset with me. I thought if I just push the thoughts out of my head it wouldn’t be real.” 

“It doesn’t work like that, Buddy.” 

He lets out a chuckle. “I understand that now.” 

“So tell me this. Is Josh your boyfriend.” 

Tyler nods, and his eyes get real big 

“What?”

“You two haven’t had sex right?” 

Tyler let’s out a laugh. “No, we haven’t.” 

“Well it’s important for you to know that I accept you for who you are. I wouldn’t be a Dad if I couldn’t accept this part of you.” 

Tyler wipes his face with his hands and smiles.   
“I think I’m falling for Josh.” 

“Does he treat you good?” 

“He treats me better than good. Perfect even.” 

“Then that’s what matters. Doesn’t mean I won’t kill him if he hurts you, but if you’re happy, I’m happy.” 

Tyler hugs his dad for the first time in a long time. It was a real hug. Not one of those awkward side hugs, but a genuine hug. 

“Now how about we get ready for this party huh?”


	11. Chapter 11

The rest of the evening is spent preparing for the guests and setting up the house. Pictures had to be taken before the guests arrived. Josh and Tyler’s were taken by Zack he had all but had it with photos. 

The guests arrived at seven and everyone was ready for midnight. Tyler and Josh spent most of the time talking in the kitchen. Over hearing conversations and having their own. 

“I’m proud of you. For telling them.” 

“Thank you. I’m glad I’m not ashamed of myself.”

“You never had a reason to be.” 

“I know. But now i believe it.” 

Josh hugs tyler, a little tighter. He didn’t want to let him go. 

“It’s almost midnight you know.”

“12 minutes away.” 

“Let’s go in the living room and watch the count down.” 

The next few minutes are spent anxiously waiting for midnight. It would be the first time they kissed. Actually kissed. not a peck on the cheek, or the forehead. A real kiss. 

“Alright everyone! A minute till midnight!!” Tylers dad shouted and everyone ran into the living room and grabbed their partners hand. Josh and Tyler stood up and held each other’s hands. A few people stared and smiled at them. 

“5! 4! 3! 2! 1!” 

Midnight strikes and Tyler looks into Joshs eyes. 

“Ready?” 

Tyler nods. 

They close their eyes and kiss each other on the lips. His lips feel like cotton candy. Soft and warm. They slowly start to make out. Tyler’s face warms up like a heater as he moves his hands behind joshs head.   
They stop when everyone starts clapping. 

They both swore they saw fireworks dancing between them. 

“I’m in love with you, Joshua Dun.” 

“I’m in love with you, Tyler Joseph”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for supporting this fan fic. Your comments mean everything to me. 
> 
> Who knows. This may be apart of a bigger series?


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